Row, Row, Row, Your Boat

These oars look a lot like yours
These oars aren’t yours
These are our oars
These oars fell from shelf to floor
They’re our family’s only oars
I’ve looked for these oars for hours
After these, there are no more oars
Not to start a row over rowboat oars
Which ones are mine, which are yours
You row your boat, I’ll row ours

 

 

Grammar Gremlins

For the next two weeks I won’t be a victim of grammar gremlins, since I will be away for jury duty.  Here’s a post about the perils of writing, from two years ago.

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Grammar gremlins, syntax stealers

Alliteration acrobats, cliché contortionists

With distorted senses of importance

At my expense, of course

Blew things out of proportion

Stealthy scissor seizers, poisoned-penned

Word-weavers, master manipulators

Reveled in misnomers, kept busy

With both ears to the grindstone

Eyes on the wheel

Because they knew

When donkeys flew

And where clouds kept

Hidden silver rainbows

Why, the man-in-the-moon

Smiled from ear-to-ear

And while I slept, they discussed

Barbie doll grills, Groucho pants

Willy worms, hair clanks, word banks

Prose pilfering, things that were

In every sense, way too weird

 

Word Storms

Hope sprang eternal

One could always hope

Broke the mold

Broke the bank

Shivered in cold

Just plain broke

Unknown unicorns

Unexpected Disney

Goofs, gaffes

Giraffe babies

As yet, unborn

Privacy fences

Fences mended

Hiccups, hedgehogs

Halves, wholes

Plastered, pasted

Consequences

Unintended

Waste not, want not

No time to waste

Prickly pears

Privacy pleas

Privacy, please

Shutterbugs

Starlets

Beautiful faces

Without hiding places

Charlatans

Blanketed in

Loosely knit

Cardigans

Wrong-way

Wayward Willies

Wicked Wandas

Agreed–word storms

Made the world

Seem weird

 

 

Insane Word Games

Napoleon Bonybutt

Elfin John, and someone

named, Elvis Davis

in a bit of lunacy

stumbled over

stigma enigmas

walruses, stigmasauruses

the twinge–not, just one

there were two of them

they wanted three

lightning stripes

patterns and stripes

tried on for sighs

nothing too loose

nothing to lose

run-on sentences

ran on-and-on

last chance for change

missed–because, they did

everything wrong

and that was all-there was

Wouldn’t It Be Weird…?

If “m’s” and “n’s” switched places in words

My dyslexic tendencies would go berserk

When menagerie became “nemagerie”

From there it would become far worse

If animals, changed to “aminals”

Unicorns to “umicorms”

Hymns to “hynms”

Aluminum to “alunimun”

Gymnasiums to “gynmasiuns”

If that weren’t punishment enough

Punishment, became “pumishnemt”

Criminals, were really “crinimals”–“crinimetly!”

Anonymity, changed to “amomynity”

Museums to “Nuseuns”–“ad maseun”

Then came “solenm” and “pmeunatic”

Not to “nemtion,” “autunm” and “inagimatiom”

Autocorrect, stop “nessimg” with my “nimd”

What a pain in the “cramiun” this turned out to be!