Arise–Fellow Incompetents!

While away last week, driving at night, a car pulled alongside. “Your taillights aren’t working. The brake and turn signals were OK.”

Return trip delayed one day, and an unexpected trip to the auto repair shop. Everything covered by warranty.

As was often the case, no problems were found at the auto shop. The service advisor and myself concluded, that an automatic light control switch had been inadvertently turned off.

Who/what was to blame? Speculation would be pointless. There’s enough incompetence to go around.

After this post-Thanksgiving verbal meandering, I would offer the following words of advice.

When visiting grandma and grandpa’s house, please return electronic devices to their original settings–that includes automobiles.  Thanks in advance for your cooperation.


Lost In Space

Where oh where did the post I wrote yesterday evening go? It’s lost, orbiting somewhere in cyberspace.

No doubt, the evil Dr. Smith from “Lost In Space” was involved in its demise.

The post was about technology in cars–how far it has come since annoying seat-belt buzzers; disconnected voices from under the dashboard, that announced “your door was ajar.”

Nobody liked those automatic shoulder harnesses that snugged around one’s neck and shoulders. It was too much like being held hostage.

What if synthesized warning car voices resembled those of mothers, mothers-in-law, or backseat drivers in general?

“You’re lost. You’re going the wrong way, Mister. Stop and ask for directions.”

You’re driving way too fast. There, I told you so. That’s why you have so many speeding tickets.”

“Turn around. I think I left the water on in the bathroom.”

I don’t anyone would check the box for that option–too much like real life.

Automatic emergency braking, blindside monitoring, lane departure warning systems, make backseat driving unnecessary.

Dr. Smith stay away from my car!

Midweek– Think, Sink, or Swim

What light through yonder window breaks?  Why, it’s our long-lost friend the sun.

It’s a good day for conclusion jumping, claim jumping, line jumping, leap frogging, frog jumping; any other kind of jumping–for those so inclined.  Makes me tired just thinking about it.

Beating the bushes for story ideas–at the same time, careful not to overlook the obvious.

Fingers didn’t move as fast as my mind worked.  That will never change.

Sometimes I feel like the guy that spoke several languages; didn’t understand any of them.

Technology changed the world–changed the way we do things.  Made the world seem smaller.  In spite of advances, human nature never changed.

There’s comfort to be found when things don’t change too drastically, too quickly.  I despise planned obsolescence, which seems to occur faster-and-faster.

I’m older, like to reminisce.  Only people of my generation can relate to the same experiences.  On some days, I feel like a twenty-year-old, trapped in a sixty-eight year old man’s body.  Other days the opposite is true.

In the old days, we didn’t apply superlatives to everything that happened.

What would happen if a termite were taped to a splinter to remove it?


Password Mambo

Re-blog from three years ago.  The problem is not better, if anything, it’s gotten worse.  There are even more passwords.  Then, there’s the issue of password security.


Too many passwords

Cluttered my mind

For banking?

Bill paying?

I’ve fallen behind

Meaningless combos

Of letters, digits

Never remembered


Names, like





Forgotten passwords

Did the mambo

Mocked me

From somewhere

Out there

In cyberspace




Curses: Foiled Again!

Warning: For those with sensitive ears–a rant could break out at any time.  My main computer stopped recognizing Wi-Fi early this morning.  That’s the second computer in this household with the same Windows 10 issue.

The laptop went on the fritz over the Holidays; repaired by my granddaughter’s boyfriend.  He built a repair program into the software. It’s been used successfully, repeated times.  Too bad Arjan’s not available. My level of expertise doesn’t go much beyond turning these devices off and on.

In my opinion, Windows 10 and its inherent instability, have done more to sell Apple products, than any multi-million dollar advertising campaign could have ever done.  Why do my Windows 10 equipped computers continue to have dysfunctionalities with Wi-Fi?

Not so fast, villainous, dastardly Windows 10–I’ve still got some tricks up my sleeve.  I plugged a high-speed internet cable directly to the Ethernet port.  A temporary repair, but good enough for me.  So take that, and that, Slimy, Weasly, Windows 10!



Pardon us: Your Age Is Showing

The attention grabbing headline implied–anyone still using certain  words was hopelessly out of date.  Of course, in the digital age, the world turns with ever-increasing speed.

Expressions, words, used by parents, grandparents, people from childhood, live on in my mind.  Some have proven useful–especially in counteracting teen-speak.

  • Window light–pane of glass
  • Looking glass–mirror
  • Pocketbook–purse or wallet
  • Spud–potato
  • Fetch–fetch me those potatoes (spuds)
  • Mimeograph–antique copying machine
  • Carbon paper–archaic method of making copies
  • Dungarees–same as blue jeans
  • Smokehouse–used for smoking meats
  • Ice box–same as refrigerator
  • Much obliged–thank you for your help, I am grateful
  • Drawers–underwear; also union suit, BVD’s
  • Filling station–full service gas station
  • Fiddlesticks–exclamation of disappointment or disgust: “Oh fiddlesticks, the drain’s clogged again.”
  • Front room–parlor, or living room
  • Chum or Pal–a close friend
  • Lick, Licking–a good thrashing, or beat down.  Lick and a prayer: temporary action instead of permanent repair.  Can pertain to light housecleaning.
  • Coquette–flirtatious woman; a tease
  • Trifle, Trifling:  to waste time, to flirt with wrong intentions
  • Roughhouse–boisterous play
  • Goldbricking–goofing off on boss’s time
  • Dilly-dallying–lagging behind, or inattention
  • Reap hook/Sling blade–small, cutting scythe with curved blade