The Wichita alignment
Was practically useless
Blinded by headlights
The entire mushroom army
Couldn’t fix this traffic mess
Time of day, weather delays
Not what you wanted to hear–you say
Not kitten on the keys cute
The psychopathy of the situation
Post-Holiday, Mardi Gras
Valentines day, Winter Olympics blues
The “ick” factor influenced everything. What determined the degree of “ickiness?” It wasn’t written down anywhere, and could change at any given moment.
Some of it had to do with maturity. What was icky at age six wasn’t necessarily icky at age fifteen–or vice-versa. Things could change from icky to not-icky and back again at any time.
Anything could be icky. Certain disliked foods could be icky. Unpleasant tasting medicine could be icky. People could be icky–especially if they had icky habits. Of course the accuser’s habits were exceptions to the rule.
Bugs, worms, slugs, snails, snakes and other creepy-crawly creatures could be considered icky. Of course there were exceptions. The non-squeamish tantalized the squeamish–especially if they publicized their squeamishness and made scenes.
There were those weird kids on the school bus. The ones that caught flies and ate them for attention. They weren’t lacking dietary protein–that anyone could tell. I won’t mention any more examples, because they would send sensitivity meters off the scales. Only to say, that as icky days go, this has been one of the “ickiest.”
Guests without time to waste
Pirates, poodles, pekinese
Assigned blame, aimed to please
Blocked doors, grocery stores
Their mamas in bad moods
Whacked them with wooden spoons
Upped the ante
Five minutes more
Five minutes here
Five minutes there
But, nobody cared
She knew what to do
In these situations
Clocks without hands
Ships without rudders
Burgers without buns
Fun, beyond legal limits
Chicken Littles, peanut brittle
Log in, or get out?
Minor quibbles, put out to see
Oh, for the love of pancakes
Word of the year, word of the yawn?
Deflated Santas, compressors hissed no longer
Why? Because the congeniality well dried up
Have another cocktail weenie
Ring-a-ding, ring-a-ding, ding, ding go the Salvation Army bell-ringers.
What’s changed this Holiday Season?
Political punditry–the election ended yesterday. Today, the ashes are falling.
Political pundits do what they do best. Make claims and disappear till the next election.
Let the blame-games commence.
Enough about politics. A couple of years ago, I alluded to a warped version of the “Twelve Days Of Christmas.”
Here are more verses, in addition to, “Seven white-tailed deer,” “eleven discarded beer cans,” first and third verses–“a large front-yard hole, left by the utility company, where no hole used to be,” “Three decorated mailboxes.”
As for the rest of the song–there’s always next year.
From the social stratosphere
Propped on front yard mental blocks
No swim zones–surrounded by water
With best of everything, and no money
Phenomenons learned from lemons–without limits
Never volunteered, never admitted to anything
From jalousie windows
Got the blues–their compassion
Eaten by moray eels
Didn’t care for salads
Meat, meat, more meat
Potatoes, potatoes, and more potatoes
Until they were all starched up
Played mental games
With sock-monkey puppets
Finished against head strong winds
My lawn is squishy from excessive summer rains. Please, somebody turn off the faucet.
Perusing the news. A 100-year-old fruitcake was discovered to still be edible. Any takers?
More people are cheating on their taxes. I think the same people have always cheated–just never got caught.
The parent company of IHOP and Applebees, is reportedly ready to close up to 160 underperforming outlets. Funny thing, I was just talking about our local franchise, and how it had gone downhill.
Anyone else want to see an “Apolitical Television Network?”
Radio commercials heard many times before–“make money working from home;” “reduce credit car debt forever;” “regain your brain power.” Have to give credit for persistence.
Frozen pizzas were scattered all over the highway in an Arkansas community this week, due to a delivery truck mishap.
Elvis Presley week is fast approaching. Do you have celebration plans?
Is the current crises with N. Korea like the Cold War of the past? It is a small reminder of what it was like. The Cold War was much worse. When schools start to have “duck and cover” drills, once again–then, I’ll start to worry.
Some experts alleged predicted solar eclipse maps were inaccurate. In any case, much of the northern hemisphere, will glimpse a complete to partial eclipse. I remember safely viewing past partial eclipses by reflections, and with welder’s helmets.
A stray cat ran across the outfield during a recent St. Louis Cardinals baseball game. The team went on to win and the fluffy tabby will henceforth be known as “The Rally Cat.” The feral cat was later found, and I wish him/her well.