The Morning After

You would have to be living in a cave to not know the outcome of last night’s Super Bowl.  I take that back–one would have to live in a vacuum to not know.

Stepping in dog doo-doo was not the best way to start my day.  It could have been worse–for example, discovering it in a closed car.

Why is it that cleaning papers for eyeglasses are carefully engineered to work only for a few seconds?  If not gotten right in that miniscule window of opportunity, you’re out of luck.  Obsolescence planned down to mere seconds.

They can not be used twice–even though they’re permeated with the scent of rubbing alcohol.  Reconstituting them with household rubbing alcohol failed miserably.

Those are my concerns on this lovely, sunny, Monday morning.  Have a wonderful day, everyone.

Monday–The Day After

Back to the usual routines–the gym, walking the dogs, taking out the trash.  No more tiptoeing around the house, at my usual waking time of 6 AM.

It’s the day after my sixty-eighth birthday.  No, I’m not an attention hound.  If you missed it–it’s OK.  I’ll try to behave in a manner befitting my age.

The biggest news around these parts, is the firing of LSU coach, Les Miles.  There is that other thing–tonight’s Presidential debates.

Pretty Good For a Monday

How am I?  Pretty good for a Monday morning.

Eleven years ago, today, I was wide awake, getting ready for work.  The wind outside made the most awful howl.

Before my first cup of coffee, the power went off.

Hurricane Katrina arrived–earlier than expected.  The wind blew all day.  Trees bent, limbs, sticks, and trash blew across front lawns.  There wasn’t much rain.

My boss called, “Don’t come in to work today.  We won’t be open.”  Who would be foolish enough to be out on a day like this, I thought.

Reports, from New Orleans, and Mississippi were unbelievable.  Katrina split the difference, made landfall on the Mississippi, Louisiana state line.

So, considering what happened eleven years ago–I’m pretty good for a Monday.

 

Just Another Manic Pun Day

It’s not easy to ignore today’s top news story.  The Academy Awards–and all the hoopla that went with it.  This gave rise to a new tradition–terrible puns, and a day to celebrate them.  Nobody seems to like Mondays, so how about “Manic Pun Days” instead?  You’re welcome to come up with your best, sorry, I meant “wurst” efforts.  Do it for Leap Day–unless you’re chicken.  That would be murder most fowl.

  • Liver patois
  • Sleeveless in Seattle
  • Listen to the Muzak
  • Just the fax, ma’am
  • The diatribe has spoken
  • Lady Chatterly’s Liver
  • What have you done for me philately?
  • Shortest distance between two paints
  • I’m grinning from here to here
  • The Buick stops here

Monday Litany

Coffee can’t work soon enough

We want to go outside

They begged–with pleading eyes

Where’s our treats?

Headlines screamed

Talk, talk–nobody listened

Came to grips with facts

Your side, my side

Long time before election

Trump @&%@$^n sure

He’s swearing off profanity

People that never knew

What fifties were like

Wanted to go back

To bobby sox, poodle skirts

Forgot about the atomic age

When the cold war was real

I HOPE I’M NEVER THAT BUSY

After my workout, I sat down at one of the two tables in the coffee area.  The gentleman to my left read his newspaper in silence.  There was no response to my, “How’s it going?’ Head nod, guy greeting.

He apparently craved his privacy.  At least he didn’t tell me to buzz off–or something worse.  This was the Deep South, not an urban megalopolis.  People were generally friendly–except for some transplants and visitors.

At the end of the next table, everybody crowded around a middle-aged man, with an opened can of tuna and crackers.  I imagined them as hobos around a campfire, sharing what they had.

This was Monday, the thirteenth.  Nothing significant about it for me–except that my day started with a dental appointment.  Not that I feared going to the dentist; there was always the chance of a cavity or two.

Has there ever been a CSI episode featuring evidence found between patient’s teeth?  A strange thought as I read diplomas on the wall.  Dr. “L” was pretty cool for a dentist.  If he paused to consult Gray’s Anatomy between procedures, I’d have to leave.  It’s never happened so far.  A clean bill of dental health–no cavities.

WordPress gurus refreshed the home page–that was news.  I barely learned the last revision.  This time, posts are classified, by reading time–reading time down to mere seconds.  The total number of likes on posts seemed to be missing.

That was the strangest thing that happened this Monday, the thirteenth.  I hope I’m never so busy–that every second has to be accounted for.  My life may not be as exciting as some–it’s exciting enough for me.