My wife’s complaint when eating pasta–the amount of pasta seemed to grow.
Washed the car today. Good weather for December. Kept finding more dirty spots and paint scratches.
I have a healthy appetite, but sometimes porterhouse steaks are too much to consume at one sitting. That’s what doggy bags were for.
Long layovers at the airport. Can’t get too comfortable, because it isn’t the same as home. Ears tuned to all messages played overhead. Maybe through some miracle, my flight will board early?
Graduation ceremonies: On all levels seem to go on and on; before candidates march to the podium. High school bleacher seats are downright uncomfortable. College level graduations, tend to have better seating.
Waiting at the doctor’s/dentist’s office. You made an appointment and were on time. Waiting for an hour in a tiny examining room is excruciating. I know doctor’s are overbooked–doesn’t make it any easier. Plenty of time to brush up knowledge by reading medical posters on the walls.
With made-up names
Filled up tanks
Checked the oil
Give me your wallet
Said, winsome, handsome
Drivers, with doors left open
Gulped from big, sippy cups
Danced cheese doodle, two-steps
Excessive content alarm
Buzzed, to the point
Fast talking somnambulists
Still clad in footy pajamas
Five bucks, bought
A lot more junk
Demanded–cold, hard, cash
Without clear answers
Whatever happened to?
Who was stronger
Fearless Fly or Mighty Mouse?
Could one escape a runaway elevator
by jumping up before it hit the bottom?
Why not talk to strangers?
“Do you have Prince Albert in a can?” Asked the prankster caller. “Well, don’t you think you better let him out?” The caller hung up to guffaws of laughter.
Telephone pranks, prevalent during my misspent youth–along with, “Is your refrigerator running?” “Yes it is,” was the expected answer. “Then you better catch it, it’s running down the road.”
Townsfolk knew they were kids from the neighborhood and meant no harm.
Aren’t junk phone calls annoying? During all hours of the day, especially at inconvenient times.
Telemarketers bad enough, political calls were the absolute worst. Always from the same numbers. Unfamiliar numbers, never answered. Didn’t unwanted callers ever get the message?
No call lists never seemed to help. Telemarketers and their ilk, had ways to hurdle such roadblocks. They used the local area code prefix to snare the unsuspecting. Robocalls randomly dialed number sequences.
Wireless phones were not exempted. Junk calls and text messages abounded.
Games played for commercial purposes, or games played by neighborhood pranksters? I prefer neighborhood pranksters.
Oh, I don’t know
What’s new with you?
Ain’t nothing to it.
How about you?
Now, that the old business was out of the way.
Did you hear about the Chicago barber offering spray-on beards?
No, was it the same as spray-on hair?
Not quite, but almost the same.
For those that couldn’t wait, or couldn’t grow their own.
If I couldn’t grow the real thing, I would just as soon do without.
After everything’s over
The best that could be said
Was–that he meant well
According to unofficial
Applicable, caveats, disclaimers
Buick is removing its own name
From its cars next model year
Rumor has it–during a two-year
Transitional period, Buick autos
Will have T-A-F-K-A-B badging
You’re only as good as
What you’ve done lately
Lost lots of bets–I’ll bet
Everyday is someone’s birthday
Bought things couldn’t take back
Took back things that couldn’t be bought
Were there such things as social media rights?
Look what happened when you weren’t looking
Apologies to those expecting witty profundities
There’s never a sasquatch or bigfoot around when you need one
By the time you “get it” the thrill has already gone
Still reeling from all-day sucker punches?