When the ‘Net Is Down

It happens with a greater frequency than it should. Who or what is to blame? My ISP comes from the local, embedded telephone company. There are other sources. I don’t like things that are overly complicated.

Maybe it’s due to a threatening weather front? I’m not a meteorologist. Even though, in the AF, I tried to be one.
The job title, “Weather Observer” was tempting.

What to do when the internet goes down? The same advice your parents gave when you said, “I’m bored. There’s nothing to do” applies.

Read a book. Go for a walk. Clean your room. Write something. Write to someone. Remember when people still wrote letters? Talk to someone you’ve been thinking about. Do what people did before the internet came along.

Heigh-ho, heigh-ho, off to the warehouse membership store I go.

INN: Minute Newsbit (An Update)

Most of my writing efforts happen early, since I’m a morning person.  A trip to the dentist, followed up by a trip to the DMV, and my morning was shot.

Channel 10 News had a film crew outside the DMV–which is also a branch courtroom facility.  They didn’t catch my best side; as a matter of fact–if they caught me at all, it was from the backside.  This reminded me of a post from two years ago.


From archives–an update.  Mr. Charles Sandwyche, subject of my  2015 DMV story, complained about people mispronouncing his last name.  “It is pronounced ‘Sandw-i-k-e’ with a long ‘I’ sound, followed with a hard ‘ch’–not ‘sandwich’ as in ‘cheese sandwich’.  Think of it like “Sandwhite” then change the ‘T’ to a ‘K.’  Mr. Sandwyche once considered changing his last name to something simpler.

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“FU-EE-2–UU,” Mr. Charles Sandwyche said to the Lynnwood, HJ DMV, when his request for a specific vanity plate inscription was denied.  “I was totally shocked–because it wasn’t obscene or anything.  It’s a violation of free speech–if you ask mej.  They offered me “KA-BLU-EE,” “NUTZ-2-YW,” “EE-I-I-OU,” and “QAA-POWE” as alternatives.  Those weren’t anywhere near what I wanted.  So, I guess I’ll mope along with random letters and numbers.

“We try to give registrants what they want when we can,” Said Robin Batson, Secretary of NJ Department of Vehicle Registrations.  “We thought ‘FU-EE-2-UU’ could potentially incite someone to violence.  Especially with the amount of road rage incidents these days.”

“Don’t get me wrong–I’m not putting any of that on Mr. Sandwyche.  I’m sorry Mr. Sandwyche was disappointed.  There were many viable and creative alternatives available.  One of my favorites is ‘DT-DU-DOG-DU’–it’s humorous, and a public service message at the same time.  So far, there have been no takers.  Maybe Mr. Sandwyche isn’t a dog person?”

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1-24-17, Lantz Walters, “Minute Newsbit” Imaginary News Network–

 

 

 

In It To Win

It’s not an Olympic event–yet.  Maybe it should be?

I could, for sure, win gold in the 100m complaining competition.

My frustration mounts.  This is the second time I’ve written this same post about complaints.

Two post drafts disappeared–one was found on my dashboard, the other is gone, but not forgotten.  If this one disappears, I’ll have to step away from the computer for a minute or two.

The recalcitrant posts have been rounded up.  I’m worn out.  There has to be an easier way to do things.  But, if there isn’t–it’s good training for complaining.

 

OPEN THE WINDOWS

Windows 8.1 was familiar–not mastered by any means.  Windows 7 worked just fine for me.  That’s why my old PC still has the old operating system.  My wife thinks I keep it as a crutch.  Maybe it’s true.  She’s got her smart phone and I-Pad to keep her company.

Then, along came Windows 10.  My oldest computer is a laptop.  Basic functions barely worked with Windows 10.  It goes beyond internet speed.  E-mails scroll, won’t open.  It sits there, like a brick–scrolling, scrolling; mocking me.

Many would suggest, “Get an Apple.”  Apple computers were more expensive–as I recently discovered.  If they are less prone to change and less frustrating–they would be well worth it.  At this point, I’m open to suggestions.

When horseless carriages came along, belching, sputtering, backfiring–skeptics shouted, “Get a horse.”  Technological change is inevitable.  This old, sway-back horse is having trouble this morning.

My printer’s disappeared somewhere in cyberspace.  I can plainly see it–same place it’s always been.  Excuse me, while I organize a search party.