From the Boneyard

H. H. Gregg and Applebees, latest discards, tossed on the growing rubble pile of failed/failing franchises. Regurgitated from murky waters of competition, public tastes, balance sheets drowned in red ink.

Shining new faces atop the trash heap, fade in relentless summer suns, until washed away into the recesses of memory.  Forgotten by most, except for a few nostalgia freaks, such as myself; waiting to spring out on some obscure trivia night.  From dusty shelves, some reporters reaching for ratings, will find fodder for another “whatever happened to?” story to fill a slow news day.

The cemetery of fallen franchises grows ever larger.  Still more are on the critical list–Sears and K-Mart come to mind.  May the fallen rest in peace.  I wish the rest safe passage on their way to franchise Valhalla.

Franchises failed for various reasons.  Why Outback Steak House couldn’t make it locally is still a mystery.  Speaking from my little corner of the world–what was with the proliferation of restaurants offering chicken fingers?  “To franchise gurus, venture capitalists, wherever you may happen to be–help, we’re drowning in chicken finger restaurants down here!”





A new supermarket king
Emerged, from grocery greenery
Punching, jabbing, hitting hard
Kicking butt-taking names

This new king, made
Lots of dough, for lots of folks
So much dough–you could say
They’re rolling in it
Yes, that’s right
They’re rolling in it

It comes in by the truckload
It comes in by the bale
Growers, know this–so they
Grow enough for an army
Grow enough to feed a whale

They’re making dough
By the fistfuls
They’re rolling in it
Yes, that’s right
They’re rolling in it

And–if you’re not afraid of it
Grow yourself, some of it
In the front yard, back yard
Grow it somewhere–who cares?
Then, grow yourself, some more

And, before you know it
The dough will come rolling in
Lots of dough–and you’ll be
Rolling in it
Yes, that’s right
Rolling in it

Perhaps, you’re still lost
Amongst, leafy greens
Wilted cabbage heads
Insane, in romaine remains
Break free, from the madness

The dough is there
Get it–grab it!
What the hail
Are you waiting for?