Threshold

While some had their uppity noses out of joint

The nightmarish threshold of a dream

Returned night after night

Twenty year olds with written memoirs

Read acceptance speeches–spouted

Insane litanies about limitations

Hoarders without borders

Grouchy, out of sorts

Scarfed movie theatre popcorn

Lamented the same hour

Lost every spring

Never to return

Defenders of the faith

Called it news

Risk, reward–risk, reward

Tsk, tsk–all risk without reward

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Stop Calling Them Ugly!

Dr. Sterling P. Phillips, Chair Professor of Agronomics at Nebraska Southern University, theorized that perhaps, plants and veggies had feelings.  Less than perfect vegetables were being sold as “ugly vegetables” at discount prices.

“They may indeed be blemished and misshapen, but is it necessary to refer to vegetables in this manner?  It’s been proven in several studies that plants responded to positive stimuli–soothing music, calming voices.  We would be well advised to treat vegetables better.”

“Then, perhaps plants would respond to positive stimuli by growing more; yielding more fruit; allowing us to feed more of the world’s populations.”

When Dr. Phillips was asked about the effect of blemished vegetable sales on market prices–he responded.  “That’s bound to cause more competition and lower commodity prices in the long run.”

Misshapen vegetables resembling profiles of famous  people showed up on e-bay and other websites.  “Will their value go down if marketed ugly vegetables continue to sell at such a rapid pace?”

“I’m not addressing vagaries of e-bay and other websites.  As far as I’m concerned, resemblance of vegetables to people and/or animals is purely happenstance.  As P. T. Barnum said long ago, ‘There’s a sucker born every minute.’ And please stop calling them ‘Ugly Vegetables.’  Use ‘blemished’ or ‘less than perfect’ instead.  Let’s be positive around our plants and our plants will respond positively.”

 

“Mother and Child,” http://www.boredpanda.com/

Monday Litany

Coffee can’t work soon enough

We want to go outside

They begged–with pleading eyes

Where’s our treats?

Headlines screamed

Talk, talk–nobody listened

Came to grips with facts

Your side, my side

Long time before election

Trump @&%@$^n sure

He’s swearing off profanity

People that never knew

What fifties were like

Wanted to go back

To bobby sox, poodle skirts

Forgot about the atomic age

When the cold war was real

PLUTO FLYBYS/PLUTO FLYBOYS

We can’t leave Pluto alone

Pluto with newly discovered

Odd lumps and bumps

Probably from being

Pushed around

The solar system

Denied planetoid status

In the previous decade

What lies behind this

Pseudo-planet madness?

It seems nebulous

I hope not nefarious

I have a hunch–we may be

Looking for landfills

To store space junk

WHAT A WEEK THAT WAS

TW#3

“Are you OK in there?”

“Yes, I just need time–to

Make a few adjustments”

For nine to fivers

It’s the beginning

Of the weekend

Two whole days, away

From the wonky, wacky

Workday grind

And what a week it was

Packed with extreme

Pendulum swings

And that’s about the size of it

From here behind the mask

–image, http://www.catalystdc.com/