Whipped Topics

Sock mending, deficit spending
On topic, whipped topping
Top of the morning
Mourning doves
In the pink, in the red, in the black
There’s more in the back
Green with envy
Green-eyed jealousy
Yellow-bellied cowards
Behind jalousie windows
Got the winter blues
Since the yawn of dawn
Big deals–compassion eaten
By moray eels
Sea monkeys
Animal magnetism
Pheromones, how to meet girls
X-ray glasses, chinchilla ranches
TV doctors, grim prognosis
Fatalists, philatelists
New family feudalists

A Cloudy Thursday

Weather is about to turn cooler–typical for fall. My two dogs are barking at every move the contractor makes across the street. That’s their job I suppose–to watch the neighborhood.

An observation: This blog, after five-plus years, has matured. Not that there aren’t any more mountains to climb. I just don’t feel the same urgency to publish something new every day. A bigger concern, is to avoid repeating myself.

Several bloggers, I followed, disappeared, or no longer actively publish, for reasons known only to themselves.  Situations and people change.  Five years are a long time in the blogging world.

Grammar Gremlins

For the next two weeks I won’t be a victim of grammar gremlins, since I will be away for jury duty.  Here’s a post about the perils of writing, from two years ago.

——————————————————————

Grammar gremlins, syntax stealers

Alliteration acrobats, cliché contortionists

With distorted senses of importance

At my expense, of course

Blew things out of proportion

Stealthy scissor seizers, poisoned-penned

Word-weavers, master manipulators

Reveled in misnomers, kept busy

With both ears to the grindstone

Eyes on the wheel

Because they knew

When donkeys flew

And where clouds kept

Hidden silver rainbows

Why, the man-in-the-moon

Smiled from ear-to-ear

And while I slept, they discussed

Barbie doll grills, Groucho pants

Willy worms, hair clanks, word banks

Prose pilfering, things that were

In every sense, way too weird

 

Who Was Pookie Snackenberg?

It’s another rainy day after a mild winter.  The mosquitoes are back.  Outdoor plans have been squelched.

Racking my brain for topics to post.  Trying too hard, complaining about it, never worked in the past.  Tuesdays are traditionally slow news days, anyway.

Which leads to the question of “Who was Pookie Snackenberg?”

Pookie Snackenberg, was an invention of Jack Carney, fifties radio DJ for St. Louis station WIL, in the dizzy, high-flying days of AM rock radio.

Pookie Snackenberg, fictional teen hero, represented crazy stunts by rock and roll DJ’s all over the country in the clamor for listeners and ratings.  Pookie Snackenberg buttons were available at the station and sponsor’s retail locations.

In another publicity stunt, Carney asked listeners to pull tuning knobs off their parents’ home and car radios, so dials couldn’t be moved from WIL.

My late father-in-law must have gotten the memo, because the tuning knob on his pickup truck radio was always missing.

As a public service, when there’s nothing to talk about; or you’re in need of a trivia topic–remember to ask, “Who was Pookie Snackenberg?”  And, you’re welcome, happy to be of service.

Fortune Cookie Guru’s Fortunes Fizzle

Donald Lau,  chief fortune writer at Wonton Foods–the largest provider of fortune cookies, noodles, and other Chinese staples; after 30 years has writer’s block.

I used to write 100 a year, but I’ve only written two or three a month over the past year, Lau recently told “Time” magazine.

It happens to everyone sooner or later.  Thirty years was a good run.  Mr. Lau plans to step down–let someone else take over.  Over the years, fortune cookie fortunes have changed.  Twenty-first century fortunes lean more to new age philosophy.

According to a Time article, some diners have taken cookie fortunes way too seriously.  The fortune cookie company was investigated in 2005, when 110 Powerball lottery players won about $19 million after using the “lucky number” on the back of fortunes.  A jilted wife claimed to be the victim of her husband’s fortune promising him romance on his next business trip, and a satisfied customer wrote to say he got a new job after reading a fortune about a new opportunity coming his way.

I wondered if Mr. Lau was ever envious of writers in other genres?  For example, greeting card writers.  Greeting card authors, could at least fall back on terrible puns.  Puns so terrible–they were cute.  Have a “punny day,” “wasn’t that the punniest thing?” or other drivel, equally lame.

My personal favorite is alliteration.  It’s almost an obsession.  An awful affliction, and a struggle, to allow alliteration an amenable amelioration.  But, that’s not the point.  Mr. Lau kept it fresh, kept it real for thirty years.  Few of us, myself above all, will ever do as well.

 

–Highlights from an original article, penned by Kristen Bahler, “Money Magazine Careers”–