Small Talk Monday

What’s new?

Oh, I don’t know

What’s new with you?

Ain’t nothing to it.

How about you?

Now, that the old business was out of the way.

Did you hear about the Chicago barber offering spray-on beards?

No, was it the same as spray-on hair?

Not quite, but almost the same.

For those that couldn’t wait, or couldn’t grow their own.

If I couldn’t grow the real thing, I would just as soon do without.

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Wandering In Forbidden Gardens

A misguided woman walked into the men’s changing room at the YMCA yesterday. There were no screams. She walked out with no fanfare. It would have been far different, had the tables been turned.

A lot has been said recently about the internet being a giant echo chamber.  Following one’s passions, without regard to opposing views, is not only possible, but also the norm.

Trips to the DMV were always interesting–if one could get past the frustrations of waiting, confusing signage, and rude employees.

Where else were there such cross-sections of humanity in one place waiting for the same things?  Was rudeness a qualification for employment there?

A sign with large block letters above the door to the visual examination and picture-taking room had braille lettering below.  The sign readable to the sighted–only readable to the visually impaired from a step-ladder.

Equal opportunities for all capabilities?  Nobody could reach the sign to read the braille lettering.  It certainly raised questions in my mind.  I suspected it had something to do with the facilities’ compliance with ADA laws.  All signage had to have both types of lettering.   Compliance with little common sense–if you asked me.

 

What a Difference a Day Made

Clicked on click bait
Searched for–
Something earthshaking
Something brilliant
Something profound
Found suggestions already knew
Wasted time watching people
with whom I had nothing in common
that didn’t care a whit about
anything, but themselves
Life is a continual series
Of turns–sometimes
In wrong directions

Roundabout Rants & J-Turns

A nearby beach community recently came up with another gem of brilliance.  I’m not a resident, so none of the following affects me directly.  These are simply annoyances when passing through.

Beach boulevard intersections were converted to a series of intersections requiring J-turns. Left turns from this major, four-lane thoroughfare, are accomplished by going past where one formerly turned directly into shopping centers; then by entering double left turn lanes, making U-turns, then making right turns.

Did that make any sense? Reasoning was to avoid left turns against oncoming traffic at busiest intersections. No argument from me on traffic safety issues. I think pedestrian-friendly overhead walkways are needed more. There have been numerous pedestrian fatalities.

I’m against their proposed traffic circle on Canal Rd. Why take a perfectly controlled intersection and turn it into chaos? Is it that the city doesn’t want to maintain traffic signals? Most people in this country don’t know how traffic circles work–as to rights-of-way.

I refuse to pay 3.50 fare each way to cross the Intercoastal Waterway on their privately owned bridge. So what, if it’s an extra five miles to go around. It’s the principal of the thing. Rumor is, they may build another new bridge to the west of the existing one.  It would also be privately owned.

Fresh From the Backyard Grill

It’s a stormy Sunday afternoon and evening. There have been tornado warnings. I’m grilling shrimp kabobs–under porch roof, of course.

Different things run in and out of my mind. Not getting wet on trips back to the house is of utmost importance. Not overcooking the shrimp is secondary.

Remedies for baldness always amuse me. Not that I have an excess of hair at my age. Such remedies have been around for ages.

Do they work? It’s difficult for me to fathom how fibers from an “overgrown pepper shaker” would bring relief. If they give those challenged by the lack of hair some satisfaction–I’m all right with it.

Another “screen grabber” extolled a scientific discovery that all life may have originated on Mars. That would certainly be at odds with the “Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus” way of thinking.  These stories repeat themselves with regularity.

Rinse, Lather, Repeat

My lawn is squishy from excessive summer rains. Please, somebody turn off the faucet.

Perusing the news. A 100-year-old fruitcake was discovered to still be edible. Any takers?

More people are cheating on their taxes. I think the same people have always cheated–just never got caught.

The parent company of IHOP and Applebees, is reportedly ready to close up to 160 underperforming outlets. Funny thing, I was just talking about our local franchise, and how it had gone downhill.

Anyone else want to see an “Apolitical Television Network?”

Radio commercials heard many times before–“make money working from home;” “reduce credit car debt forever;” “regain your brain power.” Have to give credit for persistence.

Frozen pizzas were scattered all over the highway in an Arkansas community this week, due to a delivery truck mishap.

Elvis Presley week is fast approaching. Do you have celebration plans?

Is the current crises with N. Korea like the Cold War of the past? It is a small reminder of what it was like. The Cold War was much worse. When schools start to have “duck and cover” drills, once again–then, I’ll start to worry.

Some experts alleged predicted solar eclipse maps were inaccurate.  In any case, much of the northern hemisphere, will glimpse a complete to partial eclipse.  I remember safely viewing past partial eclipses by reflections, and with welder’s helmets.

A stray cat ran across the outfield during a recent St. Louis Cardinals baseball game.  The team went on to win and the fluffy tabby will henceforth be known as “The Rally Cat.” The feral cat was later found, and I wish him/her well.