Rediscovered From the Past

I was formerly a communications technician for a regional telecommunications company. Ever-changing regulations, tech and corporate speak–revenge came in the form of “new” repair accounting codes. Found these while cleaning out the attic.
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CODES RELATED TO PHONE 1

9991X———————–Phone 1—Lost Tickets

USE THIS CODE WHEN MARS IS IN RETROGRADE. PLANETARY ALIGNMENT IS CONTRAINDICATED. THIS CODE WILL BE FORTHCOMING FROM GUI AND PREVIOUS TO THE ROLLOUT OF CLAPTRAP. ORDER AN EXTRACTOR LOCALLY FROM SUPPLY CHANNELS.

9992X———————–Phone 1—“Stale” Tickets

DIAGNOSTIC TICKETS WHICH HAVE GONE THROUGH PUTREFACTION FROM IMPROPER DIAGNOSTICATION. CLOSE OUT ATTEMPTS RESULT IN A FLASHING “TILT” DISPLAY ON THE HANDHELD. CAUTION MUST BE EXERCISED TO PREVENT INFESTATION OF INFINITESIMAL ELECTRONIC CYBER MITES.

6666X———————–Phone 1—Unnecessary Tickets

USED ONLY WHEN FIELD PERSONNEL EXPERIENCE BEFUDDLEMENT AND CONSTERNATION FROM PREVIOUSLY HELD ASSUMPTIONS, THAT IN THE UNIVERSAL ORDER, PHONE 1 PROBLEMS HAVE A RELEVANCY THAT IS NO LONGER WEIGHTED AND MAY BE SOMEWHAT AMORPHOUS. INQUIRIES SHOULD BE REFERRED TO THE DEPT. OF OBSCURITY AND OBLIQUENESS, HEREAFTER DESIGNATED AS DOODOO.



Author: warturoadam77p

70 year old married retired communications worker with three grown children, transplanted from the Midwest to the sunny Gulf Coast.

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